Crystal Clear Communication

Whenever I write, I always hope and try to clearly display my message so that what I’m thinking is understood by everyone.  It seems with writing, people can completely misunderstand what you’re saying which is a possibility I usually overanalyze.  I do not know why I bother so much in wondering if my readers understand my message because ultimately no one can completely understand unless they jump inside my head.  Even then they may not understand, because I don’t even understand what I think about.

In my previous entry I talked some about how I believe it is up to the individual to find the path they are meant to tread.  I do believe in the end it is up to the individual to find their way but this by no means is done alone.  Over the past year as I have tried to find meaning behind my tragedy, I have done so by listening to the words and ideas of others, and then turning to my soul to discover what I’ve absorbed means to me.  When I dive into my realm of thoughts in my writings I am either knowingly or unknowingly gathering information from the global consciousness and creating new meaning through my own understanding.  It is up to me to decide the best way to live my life but without the knowledge of others, I would be caught in a sea of fog.

In short, I wanted to say I always appreciate the comments and advice received by others.  I don’t want my thoughts on the responsibility of an individual’s decisions to stop my readers from speaking their mind about the decisions I’m making.

These statements may be unnecessary but I’m just satisfying my paranoia and need to strive for crystal clear communication. 


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32 Responses to Crystal Clear Communication

  1. Unknown says:

    Wow! Great space! Best of luck!

  2. Unknown says:

    Ok, I\’ve spent more time reading your space than any other-guess I could write a little more. I\’ve looked at a lot of spaces but yours is exceptional. I admire you. Thank you for sharing your life! I can\’t begin to imagine what you\’ve gone through. I imagine being in your shoes and . . . I guess you don\’t know til it happens to you. And your so hott! How tall are you? Maybe thats out of line. I don\’t know, but I\’ve saved your space in my favorites and I\’d like to check back if thats ok. Thankx and take care!

  3. Shannon says:

    Colin,No need to explain your thoughts. And I will keep speaking my mind, as I know you will do the same!Take care!Shannon

  4. Patricia says:

    Colin – I always fear the same when I write and even when I comment. I\’ve learned much from you and it has helped me on my personal journey. Thank you for sharing your thoughts -really you are exceptional at putting things into words. You have often mentioned emotions that I have had but never articulated -reading them makes me acknowledge what I am feeling or have felt with a better language in my head or (self-talk as you will) – I often think of the time when you mentioned the emotion of a shift in your plans for the day – I\’ve always struggled when trying to put that feeling into my understanding, when I read your words it made it easier to identify that feeling and deal with it personally just by recognizing it. For me before it was just a frustrated out of sorts feeling and I didn\’t know why I had it – you helped me there tremendously. That is only one example. You have also posed interesting questions that have made me think about my way of going about things, in particular, sprituality. Thank you for that and all that you write. My best to you – patti

  5. Anita says:

    Hello,Did not have a chance to read your previous entires yet, but must comment on this one.I thought of you and Patti a lot last week… I think mostly becouse the two of you are such \’deep souls\’… if you know what I mean.Dont worry about how people misunderstand what you write about… ha ha… Took me few weeks but I was able to get over it… becouse SMART souls will always know, that you do not mean harm.You are looking to find meaning in the tragedy that struck you… I was looking to find meaning is so much tragedy myself: Just something that I came out of my little vacation is that EVERYTHING has the potential of being a gift, we just have to keep our HOPE.We also have to GIVE HOPE to others… that somehow makes our hope more potent… And you definatelly fit that GIVING hope part!I mean look at you! Look at you water skiing!!!I really belive in what I wrote about you in my blog:\’That\’s what I call getting out of the boat\’I do belive that sooner or later you WILL walk on water!!!Have a wonderfull day Colin,One of your \’blog fans\’Anita

  6. Shannon says:

    Okay, I have to tell you that I think Im spending too much time reading your blog. I had a very bizarre dream last night and YOU were in it! Whats up with that? 🙂

  7. Colin says:

    Anita,"Just something that I came out of my little vacation is that EVERYTHING has the potential of being a gift, we just have to keep our HOPE.We also have to GIVE HOPE to others… that somehow makes our hope more potent"Very much related to what I pondered over in church this morning. The pastor reminded us that what we give we shall receive. Give love and you will receive love. Give hate and you will receive hate. Give compassion and you\’ll receive compassion. Give hope and receive hope.Glad to see you back,Colin

  8. Shannon says:

    As far as Dreamland…well it wasnt anything EXTREMELY bizarre…sorry to disappoint you! But just strange…if you want me to go into detail I will…might be kind of embarrassing though! LOL However, I do remember giving you a big kiss on the cheek at some point!Feel free to stop in and say hi in my dreams anytime! :-)Shannon

  9. Shannon says:

    Hey Colin,I just read your comment on Patti\’s site and just wanted to let you know that you have touched my life as well just by being YOU! Your site is always one of the first ones I check out each day when I get home from work and you have really opened my eyes to a lot of things…not just SCI. You are certainly wise beyond your years. And I feel honored that you think enough of me to take the time to stop by my site and comment as well. Im glad I help to make you smile with all of my goofy stories! Hell, you are even showing up in my dreams now! LOL See how much you have touched my life?Its strange how you can get to know someone only online but feel like you know them. Wouldnt it be great if a group of us could actually get together in person some day? That would be one HELL of a party, Im sure!Anyway, I have said before that I have a very good friend who lives in Charlotte and if Im ever in that area, I am gracing your front door step with my presence! You are such an amazing guy, and Im sure you are even more amazing in person. Oh yeah…and Ill be sure to give you that big kiss on the cheek if I ever do meet you in person!Take care!Shannon

  10. kris says:

    Hi there Colin,my name is kristy. Im 23 and I have cystic fibrosis which is a lung disease. It has also affected my liver. I am waiting for a lung and liver transplant right now. You have been through a big ordeal and id love to talk with you more. I find it hard to find people my own age who can relate to life altering events and who i can talk to on that level. My life is about surviving and coping not partying. anyway check by my blog if you like. Im also a good friend of patti\’s as i saw your blog on her site. Take care.

  11. Patricia says:

    interesting comment here from you on what we give and receive. I do find that approaching things with love often brings love -on the other hand I have known the opposite too and have had to learn to give without expecting things in return but then i ponder you know it is true, when you give love it feels like love and somehow that giving is part of receiving hmm new way for me to look at it. I wanted to thank you for your comment. Truth be told, it choked me up a bit. I also wanted to say that you do make a tremendous difference. I think every time I stop by here – I leave with a new perspective, a thought to think over – In a healthy way I ponder what i believe and how I believe it and arrive at different conclusions than I had when I wasn\’t concious of it which is interesting. It has enhanced my life and well, how can you thank someone enough for that. Thank you! -patti

  12. Lisa says:

    I have the same concerns when I write…where I worry about whether or not my message was getting across as I intended. Then I read back what I write and it can be interpreted in different ways…depends on the reader\’s perspective and depends on the day…And I also change my own mind, depending on the mood I am in…It\’s also lacking some of the aspects of more personal communication –facial expessions, tone of voice, sarcasm…I always have though of myself as more visual when I communicate…I like to "read people"…We do what we can with this medium but it really can\’t substitute for the real thing. Regardless, the give and take and getting other people\’s perspectives is the best part about all this…And personally, I think you are a teacher…whether or not people can completely understand your exact meaning…it gets them thinking…I know you get me thinking. And I also have learned that more and more people have the same fears, hopes, etc…even if initially I would have thought their situation was drastically different than my own. (Besides, I overuse stupid punctuation when I write ….—-)))

  13. Patricia says:

    Ya got me!! You are right in your comment on my blog. I struggle with the need for confirmations – I try to pretend I don\’t need them as a defense mechanism I think – but I\’m not sure it is always healthy -I think there is a middle ground. I think for so long after my brain injury people and some doctors were telling me what my limitations might be, I had to believe in something further than what people were telling me – I had to make up my own confirmations to be a bit brave and say -"well, just because you think this will be hard for me, doesn\’t mean I\’m not going to try it -I may stink at it, but whatever." I had to stink at a lot of things and still keep doing them until I relearned some things. This was tough – according to my own inner critic and the way I thought some of the outside looked at me, I was failing – I had to come up with new ways of seeing my own small pieces of success at their own rate. I was alone much of this time (no pity please -that\’s not why I share it), it is just I had to learn to be my own cheerleader. Trust me I longed then for human compassion more than I ever thought imaginable -it was painful and I can cry just thinking about that. The problem was where to find it. I did find it eventually as I have shared in the blog, I did find much compassion through nurses in rehab and some doctors – but once I was in outpatient things were harder – in daily life, living in an apt., I felt scared and alone. I think from meeting people that this is not rare with brain injury -I can\’t speak for them though -I have no idea. To try to conquer the fear of ever feeling that way again, I have tried to build inner strength. I once proclaimed to a doctor that I didn\’t need others opinions of me as a person – he explained that we all do, we all need confirmation. I\’m sort of amazed that you picked up on that so well. I was just telling my story – it isn\’t for everyone nor is it "right" – but if someone is alone, I do want them to know that the power we have on the inside is so much stronger than can ever be expected. It is really pretty miraculous. I always hope that people know about that place within them, that place that keeps you going and helps you so much. I was so surprised at wherever that strength came from inside me – it doesn\’t really even feel like mine – but somehow it gets me through things. I guess I\’m rambling and not making much sense. What I do hope though from the very depth of me is that people, including myself, know that they are worth it -know that they have strengths and talents, even when they need to be adapted (as I had to adapte mine). Life is worth it, everything is worth it. much love, patti

  14. Colin says:

    Patti,You make complete and absolute sense. That something inside of you that keeps you going and inspired despite a lack of the human compassion you crave is a perfect essence of spirit. A piece of perfection inside all of us that needs no confirmation, that needs no persuasion to thrive of love and compassion. This perfect light is the core of our being, it is who we are, where we came from at the beginning of time. It is within this essence we must strive to exist within and ignore surface level consciousness we at humans create after childhood. Existing from the surface is what makes us feel unworthy, intimidated, self-conscious and afraid. The surface level craves for human compassion while the spirit within us needs none because it contains no ego, no pride. It is selfless, perfect, and eternal.This is where true strength and fulfillment is found. A piece of God within you.Colin

  15. Patricia says:

    Colin – Wow – you get it. you got it. Wow. I guess when I think of it this way I have never been alone. I feel a big fear leave me. Thank you -patti Do you mind if I copy and paste the last two previous comments (yours and mine) under my blog on Friends?? Let me know, this is just so well, I can\’t put it into words really -I think it will help people and wow, I know it helps me. Does it help you? -patti

  16. Patricia says:

    Actually, better yet, do you mind if I just send people here? I think what you have to say is perfect. It should be here. I want to read the comments here -you will see them and know what to write. Is that okay?? -patti

  17. Anita says:

    Collin,Dont you just LOVE Patti?She is awsome and she has tought me so much in the last month or so. And so have you ;-).It\’s interesting what you have wrote to me… Again made me think, but do you really belive that each time you give love you will recive love in return?I use to belive in karma, but only to a certain extent.Think about it:If a ball is bouncing, becouse it does it naturally, can you really analyze the bouncing… It\’s well descrobed in the physics and quantom physicks… Energy cannot be created or destroyed thing, but I really cannot say with 100% accuracy that just becouse I love someone they will love me in return 100% of times.One of the things that I am studiing this week is the concept that is hidden in Psalm 23:\’Though shall not want, the cup overfills…\’ (very rough quote of it).It\’s interesting that each time we want to posses something it actually seperates us from the divinity.When we realize that everything we need is already here, we just have to change our attitudes to GET IT!!!This Psalm actually reminds me of one of my favorite Budist Monk stories:One well known phylosofer traveled to Tibet so that he can learn everything he could about the power of human mind.He enterd a temple, and sought the master of it."I want to learn everything I can about the power of the human mind!!!" he told himSo the Monk Master said:"Let\’s have some tea…"In a dinning area they sat by a table and the master started pouring tea into his new students cup… He pourd, and pourd, and pourd… tea and all spilling all over the table.The phylosopher startell yelling:\’Hey, you\’r spilling the tea!!!!\’The master said:\’Your mnd is like this tea cup… it\’s already filled…\’Anyways… I hope that you are having good days!How\’s your nerve pain going?How is the cold weather treating you?Anita

  18. Dori says:

    hi colini just wanted to say that i like your style of writing, the inspiring words that you write, & the way you portray your thoughts. you are a talented individual. i sense that you are strong & think positive. trust me i\’m not the best positive thinker in the state so i plan to stop by here & visit & be rejuvenated for awhile 🙂 best wishes & warm thoughts from nebraskachow

  19. Colin says:

    Hey Anita,I don\’t think that in giving love means you\’ll necessarily receive love in return from that particular person, but in some way the divine will return love in your life through some form or another. It can be looked at in many different ways. One way is to say that God is a god of rewards. If you extend love and compassion to the world then God will reward you in your life by returning the favor. Or it could possibly be a balancing of energy among the universe. It seems people who are negative are constantly attracting more negative energy into their lives. While people who are positive tend to attract more positive energy. When you give love to the world, I don\’t think it\’s always easy to see the return of love. The key is to expect the return of love to occur and realize when it does so it affirms in your mind that you have the power to attract beautiful things into your life.MY nerve pain is still present but has not been nearly as bad as in the past. In observing my pain I\’ve noticed that it has been changing. The pain itself has changed as well as when the pain occurs. I believe it is simply part of the healing process and I\’m going to continue to observe and ease my way through the pain as I meditate on my healing.Cold weather has been getting to me. I\’m trying to just accept my inability to stay warm and receive the coming months of cold weather with open arms rather than a more negative approach. Since my chills don\’t seem to be going away at the moment, I need to find other ways to do with it just as I have dealt with my nerve pain.Thanks for asking. Hope you are well.Colin

  20. Anita says:

    Love your answer… It\’s in our human nature to think: I am so good to you therfore you should be nice to me too…I think that our collective concousness is improving though.What do you think?Just becouse I am curious, not to make any assumptions… what church do you go to? You do not have to answer, and dont feel bad if you dont… I am asking becouse I really like your spiritual grouth…I go to a church that is labled as \’PM\’. It stands for post-modern, and I personnaly call it \’Inked church\’. (When I was looking for a place to call home people would always look down on me becouse of the cigs, but mostly becouse my tribal band on my right hand… When I found my ministry I knew I was home becouse the service had a strong \’Goth\’ flare to it, and more ink than I saw at the \’Dome Room\’ in Chicago.Anywhoo… the PM stands for Post Modern… We are rebuilding the original church described in the book of Acts, and we sort of would like to take back the bad impression that orginized religion left on Christianity… I actually suggested that we should start wearing white capes with black, upsidedown crosses on them (oposition to the Teutonick Nights), but no one else liked that idea… :-(… I think it\’s becouse they never been to Malbork…I feel sad about the cold thing… I will look up some veda \’cures\’ for you if you\’d like… (What type are you though?), and becouse it mainly deals with balance of energies it might work really well. Especailly if you belive in it… 🙂 I do.In the mean time… how about a cup of hot coco???Big smiles and best wishes.Anita

  21. Colin says:

    Anita,I\’m not even sure what type of church it is that I\’ve been going to. I do know they just changed it to nondenominational. Church really isn\’t where I have found most of my spiritual growth. Honestly my main reason for going to church isn\’t to learn about God. I go because it is a place right can feel God\’s presence and be in an atmosphere filled with his glory. I also go because it is a place that gets me out into the community and around people with positive energy. I\’m trying hard to improve my social network as it is much smaller than I would like it to be. I always seem to run into someone from my past each time I than church which is something always slightly uncomfortable but so far it has been positive.Your church sounds quite interesting. So I have no idea what Teutonic knights are, or Malbork.I\’m not sure what veda type I am. I\’ll have to look into it.Thank you for your concerns about my coldness. It is a harmful factor in my well-being but don\’t worry I won\’t let it hold me back.I think it\’s time for another blog entry. I feel like I\’ve written several just through comments.See ya,Colin

  22. Anita says:

    OK… This blog is for you ! 😉

  23. Tricia says:

    I think your writing is positive, even when you write about negative things (if that makes sense). If you only wrote about dragonflies and flowers it would not be real, that’s not your life or anyone else. I think as a reader it is a privilege to read your entries and fully appreciate that it is not full of positive pink lies. It’s easier to live in a world of make believe than to wake up everyday to reality at time. It seems you write from your heart, and I admire that. I am not sure if you remember but about a month ago I asked you what your thoughts about some topics in psychology because I was writing an essay for grad school – the essay came out great, got into my backup school but still working on Stanford. I just wanted to thank you for your advice about writing under stress….have a great day…

  24. Shannon says:

    Hey Colin,Just wanted to stop by and say hi. Hope I didnt weird you out with my dream comments…you got kind of quiet after that! Im not a psycho freak, I swear! :-)Take care!Shannon

  25. Patricia says:

    Hi Colin! Hope you are well. I just stopped by because I saw in your comments that you might blog soon -look forward to reading. My computer is acting up and it is only 3 years old and completely outdated…nothing will let me download on to this mac. I\’m down loading something right now but I think i tried it before. I don\’t get computers – It is frustrating. I sincerely had a moment of wondering what it would look like if I just let it drop from the window to the driveway! I also was under the illusion that I could just plug in my work computer to the phone jack push go and be set! Ha! the guy on the phone at circuit city laughed at me! it was pretty funny actually. Anyway. This is a comment of complete rambling! i do hope you are doing well. It SNOWED here today – it was warmer though then the several days of rain. The snow was pretty. well. My best, patti

  26. Patricia says:

    oops forgot one other reason I actually stopped by was to tell you I put your site on my link list thing – I hope that is okay. Let me know if you want me to remove it. -patti

  27. Patricia says:

    oh for crying out loud -yep it is me again – I can\’t sleep but i\’m tired and I think i\’ve stopped by, e-mailed and phoned practically everyone I know this evening. I stopped by your website -great site. You know I tried to read the Bible for the first time in a long time last night. I read your blog about religion and your journey with God and I think it is really inspiring. I went to Catholic girls\’ school growing up -I was a figure skater and missed a lot of school early on and the small classes were a bonus because I could easily talk with the teachers and catch up on my own. It wasn\’t a school for catholics only though in fact their were many other religions and also non-religious represented. I don\’t really even know why it was called \’Catholic\’ anyway both my sister and I were dismissed from our churches sunday school classes for asking too many questions! I was obsessed with the immaculate conception and my sister got the word germ confused with pregnacy and between the two of us – 8 years apart at the age of 6 we caused some serious havoc with the sisters! Anyway, the Bible was interesting to read last night -I haven\’t picked it up in awhile, but it is all about that fearing God. I have a hard time with that. I don\’t understand it really. plus, truth be told, half the time the language gets in my way and i\’m wondering what the message is – for this reason I do miss the sermons that cleared things up a bit. I feel guilty just talking about the Bible as confusing as if lightening may strike and I hope you don\’t think i\’m a jerk for being confused. What do you normally read for inspiration? I sense from your blogs that you read quite a bit . Hope you don\’t mind me asking. You have already provided me with so much – I feel bad asking one more thing. Anyway, hope you are sleeping well. Sorry for this comment the size of a blog. Be well, dream big -patti

  28. Patricia says:

    I coordinated a conference for and met Wayne Dyer once in the city-he is a remarkable man -just being around him -it is weird he has like this positive glow of energy. HIs lecture was really interesting and my Dad, a man I have rarely seen moved to tears in public, can be emotional and teary when it comes to the wisdom of Wayne Dyer. He is very inspirational and with his words there is much perspective and focus. Yea, sleep has been completely messed up since the accident -I was a great sleeper before. I love dreaming. I just lost everything and I do mean everything on my G4 all my work and job photos – I\’m in shock. The phone has been ringing off the hook and I just can\’t pick it up – I lost everything -I can\’t believe it. And the heater broke and it is freezing -I need to straighten it all out but I need to just breathe for a little while. I don\’t know why I\’m telling you this. Honestly I think i\’m just trying to absorb the shock of everything. It seems today is one of those days where I gotta slow it all down and think of one thing at a time. I look forward to the post you are writing and hope you are well.

  29. Anita says:

    I was… silly enough… to actually read your comment during an important meeting this morning.In the middle of monotony of numbers and horrible finantial outlook for the last quarter of 05… I bursted out in an uncontrolable laugh…Am I mad? Some think so… But at you…Nah…I suffer from horrible math allergy so I understand. Things like history and world literature and languages would just invade my brain with out any effort… biology I could imagine so it was not that hard… but math… forget it!So I understand your pain :-)As to answer the question of winning… It was (as always) the Poles! Just think about it… if it went the other way I would be required to wear that cape to work…:-)))And that just solved my dilema of not knowing what I was going to be this Holloween… Yep! I will take lot\’s of pictures and post them on my blog…I am glad to hear that today you are warm!!!What are you going to do next Monday?Anita

  30. Anita says:

    The story continues…Some euro history search engine just posted the blog that I have written for you on their website…It\’s not a trackback, so here\’s the adress: this crazy or what???I am still laughing. Think about how the history freaks will rect to my H/W costume next week!!!Anita

  31. mtcutie says:

    I don\’t have any advice or anything really to input to the above blog mostly because it\’s my first time here and I don\’t know what the topic is \’really\’ but I wanted to say hello. I followed your link from Patti\’s

  32. Shannon says:

    Hey Colin,Trust me, if I was some psycho luring people in for the kill, I would make my life sound MUCH more exciting than being a special ed teacher ! HA! Glad you dont think Im a freak! HeeHee!Take care bud!Shannon

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