Social Butterfly, Compassion, and Energy

Yesterday was very much a social day.  I started going back to the lady who used to cut my hair in high school.  I used to always go to her and tell her all of my problems as she cut my huge bushy hair.  Calling her up and going back was almost like stepping back into my past which isn’t easy for me to do.  It ended up being a good thing and I enjoy my appointments with her.  Yesterday started out with a haircut in the morning and then I headed to the gym.  I hung around outside for a while with my aid Wesley trying to breathe in the moment and discover the feeling of peace within me as I gazed at my surroundings.  I didn’t quite get there. 

I purposefully went into the back door of the rehab center so I could stroll through inpatient at the hopes of running into people and boy did I ever.  It has been a while since I have been up to that area early on in the day and it was good to see some people I have not seen in a while.  After a short workout downstairs I heard the lady who helped and still helps me with my wheelchair arrangements was leaving the rehab center not by her own choice, and they were having a goodbye party for her.

The idea of the social situation made me nervous for some reason so I headed up there with an outpatient therapist.  Somehow however upon entering the situation I ended up all by myself with what seemed like a hundred eyes watching my every move.  I made my way into the atmosphere of the gathering and discovered the somber mood of what was supposed to be a party.  It was obvious no one wanted to see her leave and for good reason because in my opinion she is excellent at what she does and the seating clinic as well as the entire rehab center has just taken a huge loss.  Why you would let someone go of this stature I do not know.

After my appearance I headed back downstairs to do some more exercises then headed home.  I took a shower to get all the itchy hairs off my neck and then called my friend Natalie, ASAP coordinator.  Half an hour later my dad was dropping me off at her house so I could watch King Kong with Natalie and her sister.  It felt good to be able to get into someone’s house and simply hang out.  It’s also always fun to hang out with Natalie of course.  She’s like an antidepressant for me and does a good job of lifting my spirits.  All friends should be like that, but I guess it’s not fair to put that sort of pressure on people.  If you can’t lift my spirits than get out of my life!  I hope you can sense the sarcasm.

By the way who out there has seen King Kong?  The new one of course.  I think I need to watch it again on my own before making my decision.  At the time it seemed like just one big adventure story with way too much adventure and not enough plot.  I could probably appreciate it a lot more if I had seen the old ones.

There probably wasn’t much point in telling you all what my day was like yesterday.  It just seems strange as yesterday was a good day and today I feel so blah.  The feeling is stagnant and moist.  It seems to be hanging over me, dragging me down.  It’s not too awful a feeling but it would be nice to be able to shake it.  I shouldn’t really complain.  I don’t get down nearly as much as I used to.  I’ve been able focus much more on my blessings rather than complaining about what has gone wrong in my life.  Many times at night right before going to sleep, I’ll meditate on everyone out there in the world who has it worse off then I do.  I imagine poor children in dirty streets.  Adults and children in hospital beds suffering from extreme pain, severe illnesses, and progressive diseases.  I imagine people who have no support system, friends, family, or finances.  Once I feel compassion for these people I began thinking about people who don’t have it as bad as me but are still struggling and I’ll even feel compassion for them because suffering all depends on perception.  Overwhelming myself with compassion extends my thoughts beyond myself and my world and suddenly I have stepped out of the boundaries of  my reality which I create, a reality which only exists in my mind.  By extending my vision outside of myself I further complete who I am by merging with the oneness of all creation.

My latest reading has been “Hands of Light: A guide to healing through the human energy field”.  As I’ve said before I believe we all contain a tremendous power to heal and I believe there are some people out there who have been given special gifts to easily tap into this power.  The author of this book, Barbara Brennan, is one of these people.  Basically the book states that everything is made up of energy and energy is the predecessor to all form.  Energy is all around us, makes up our bodies and we subconsciously mold and shape this energy throughout our lives.  The book is actually very complicated and is very much a textbook rather than a simple read, but I’m finding it very interesting.  It’s strange but as I read it I feel as if healing begins taking place.  As if while reading I become more conscious of the energy which surrounds me which allows it to begin taking its natural course of healing.

I’m becoming more and more aware these days of the limiting factor of what we see contains.  That is, there is so much more to this world and to this universe than what our eyes seem to convey.  The reality we see is but a glimpse of the realities which exists beyond the normal senses.  Call me a wacko if you wish but as you sit there in front of your computer, be aware that there is much more going on around you at this moment than meets the eye.

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10 Responses to Social Butterfly, Compassion, and Energy

  1. Shannon says:

    Hey Colin,
    What a shame the rehab is getting rid of such a good employee.  Unfortunately, too many places let go of the good people.  I see it a lot in teaching.  People who dont want to \’conform\’ to the ways of the new bosses are often cast aside.  It happened to two ladies I worked with at my last school. Both of them were wonderful teachers and had been there for around 18 years.  However, new administration came in and began pushing them too hard for no reason other than they wouldnt give in.  The administration ended up pushing them out.  It was a great loss to that school to lose those ladies.  I eventually left myself before I became the next one on the \’hit list\’ to be chased out for whatever reason. 
    I know what you mean about much more going on than we can immediately see.  Its kind of strange to think about, but very true.
    Have a great weekend!

  2. Patricia says:

    Hey Colin – Sounds like a great day catching up with people. The blah feeling may be that of some tiredness too maybe? AS I always  I find your compassion a lesson. Lately somewhere I have also read too about trying to think of all that is right in the world in addition to feeling compassion. This leads one to end the thought process before bed on one of hope and well, I guess intentions. Lately  I have been trying real hard to focus on the things I can positively change, appreciate or take better care of – it has been an interesting little journey that has brought me almost a meditative peace and some more energy at the same time (sometimes in the past these two together peace and energy can equal some anxiety if the energy is of a nervous worrying kind, so I have been trying to think of it differently. I guess too that my new eating and routine for workouts is working well and that feels good. I read somewhere (it all merges) that it is good to state things in the affirmative ? even before they happen – like I could say after I publish this photo, I\’ll buy that belt I liked…not IF I publish the photo, but actually just stating simply that I know I will. It is strange. It was sort of pivitol thinking for me. I guess I have been an IF\’er for a while.:) It makes everything feel a bit more less chaotic, no actually it rather brings me great peace. Foundation and a needed confidence in the universe.
    I do believe strongly about what you say about energy. I\’m pretty aware of energy and it helps me with intuition. Which I rely on pretty much a lot. The level of energy I feel also helps me read people and makes it easier for me to meet people that I have to photograph for instance and tune into what kind of thing will best help me capture a bit of their uniqueness or connectedness on film. I love that part of photography the best. The remarkable opportunity if it is a good day to show similarities and also subtle unique qualities all in the same moment – there is a human beauty there that warms my heart. Somehow that warmth seems part of the energy I get back when I get to notice somethings. Also, I think that energy is evident in love and the way that you feel when you are around loved ones. there is great energy there. I just babysat one of my friends child and although I was exhausted once again that little wonderful huge "kid wisdom" had me smiling and laughing. Well, it is late and I am tired.. I hope that by the time you read this you will be feeling better – sometimes the blahs can be resourceful. The search to find peace is often its own reward in its many lessons along the way. As always I think you are doing so amazing. You rock! Glad you are getting out with friends and visiting people – I bet that your stopping by the leaving employee\’s party meant a lot. You constantly do the most considerate things. You have a great heart Colin. Be proud and always dream big. Sending you wishes. best, patti 

  3. Rachel Mills says:

    Hi Collin! Whenever my feet are cold I imagine a white light like saran wrap flowing from my warm head down to my cold feet and warming them up. It has always worked! I\’m gonna check out that book!

  4. Rachel Mills says:

    Thanks Collin! I was wonderin cause that\’s all I could find on Ebay lol! Take care!

  5. Patricia says:

    Wow – I wrote a novel last night here in your comments…interesting future plans it sounds. I looked it up and  it looks interesting. As far as the other thing, I always figure that knowing these things personally for me leaves me to know what doors to open – different ones instead of staying in the wrong room. If that makes sense. Hope you had a great day and a great tomorrow. best, patti 

  6. Patricia says:

    oops it already is tomorrow – I get used to going to bed on time and now it is all messed up again!!! 🙂


    As to unseen existence, you bet!  Ever seen a fish in tree?  They exist in a lot of places.  Of yes they do!

  8. k says:

    Brother Colin:
    There\’s an interesting book that I read and wrote about in my blog some time ago.  "The Holographic Universe", by Michael Talbot (you get some good pages on it if you Google it).  The author proposes a scientific foundation for metaphysical properties we experience in our physical world.  Very fascinating intersection of ideas and theories from quantum physics and mysticism.  Funny how metaphysics and advanced physics seem to agree these days.
    Thanks for sharing your thoughts,
    Sister Cat

  9. diana says:

    Your energy radiates your inner power superbly. You have such great insight into what "a little black speckle on a white cloud, really is. Our limbs are just daily maintence and in some cases lethal weapons used for destruction. So you are one of the lucky ones! Good luck on your continuing journey and know that today you have helped one more person remember to focus on the moment for growth within. As what will be will be!
    Thank you

  10. Unknown says:

    I would like to mention that there is a product that was designed by an MD for folks suffering from osteopenia (precursor to Osteoporosis) and  osteoporosis – called Bone Max. It is a specially fomulated powder which is much more bio-available to the body when drunk, as opposed to the various calcium pills, most of which are excreteed out of the body unabsorbed (thus not actually helping you rebuild bone).
    Part of the bone deterioration process is due to the presence of osteoclasts and osteoblasts – one builds up the body, the other removes old bone. Healthy individuals have a balance between these two types of cells. A combination of exercise and normal hormones in the body maintains the balance. When the balance is disrupted, due to aging, or injury, then the MDs will prescribe certain medications that curtail the bone-destroyig cells, and ask that you continue your exercise and consume various forms of calcium supplements, or naturally occuring calcium in food.
    The Physician is Dr. G. Richard Parrino at 200 South Broadway Avenue, Tarrytown, NY  10591 and his phone is 914-631-8826. They sell the Bone Max out of the office and at local pharamacies. Perhaps they can help you obtain some to help you rebuild your bones!
    Blessings upon you. I admire your beautiful writing.

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