I think everyone has that one person in their life, usually a family member, who knows exactly how to get your goat. Certain things are said which seem to ignite a flame inside of you screaming at you to defend yourself. There is a deafening impulse to let fly a string of hateful words to strike down your opponent and make them feel exactly how they just made you feel. To pull them off of the podium they seem to be standing on as they look down upon you for what they seem to think you are doing wrong. Every cell and pore of the body is fuming to feed the attack by reaching for a larger podium of your own, but in reaching for that larger podium it only initiates a Domino effect of each person standing taller and taller until both participants are so high up in the clouds all shred of reason, decency, and logic is lost and forgotten.
To not react in such a circumstance fills the body with an initial feeling a defeat. By not saying anything the attacker seems to have won the battle and it is the worst feeling to think the conversation ends with them having the last word. In my own personal experience I initially feel the blood rush to my face and my lips begin to quiver. My entire body grows hot and flushed as if the blood in my veins have begun to boil. Hate rushes to the surface, a mass amount of potential energy ready to be unleashed at my command. Yet right below this surface of hate exists a potential energy of a different kind. An energy which consists of love, peace, and forgiveness. I fight with all my might to not give into the hate and at that moment it seems to be the worst decision I could possibly make. But as I give into the silence I realize it is not a cowardly act, but a courageous and noble one, for shortly after the residue of hate which clings to my skin turns into a mist and evaporates, leaving me with a feeling of peace as if a huge burden has just been lifted off of my shoulders.
To be silent and to forgive is too often seen as giving in or failing to stand up for oneself, but what does any of us have to prove to anyone else? Why do we feel there so much power in justifying oneself and proving someone else wrong? The power felt is especially strong when that one person who knows just how to pull our strings is cast down and beaten at their own game. The game has a central point to it, a point which would only enjoy the Devil, if the Devil exists. The central point being “How can I hurt this person and make them feel rotten?”
It seems absolutely ludicrous to join in on such a game yet it also seems resistance to it is one of the hardest things to ever accomplish. When it is however, what remains is a peaceful state of surrender resulting from the overcoming of a powerful force which does not emanate for who you truly are. To get technical, to defend oneself is to identify with the ego or a false identity, which when defended only increases its power and diminishes the light of the soul. I’d much rather let my soul shine.